Is perfectionism, and the shame of never being or doing enough, running your life? Are you beating yourself up for being less than perfect?
It’s time to take our understanding of perfectionism to an entirely new level. That’s what Letters to a Perfectionist: On Shame, Fear, Love, and the Surprising Spiritual Nature of Perfectionism is all about.
Author Tad Frizzell took the perfectionistic tendencies which began to drive him in the early years of childhood and applied them to every aspect of his life. He didn’t realize how much it would cost him. The crisis of burnout which ensued after 16 years in a monastery driving himself to this elusive perfection raised the stakes to the level of life or death. This book is a product of one man’s deep exploration of the self, and what it means to refuse to love and accept yourself in a state of imperfection.
There’s a revolution happening in the understanding of perfectionism. At its worst, it’s not just a way of thinking or a way of achieving more. It’s a way of being in the world. Perfectionism is a spiritual problem which transcends religious creeds and culture. The refusal to love and accept oneself in a state of imperfection can lead a person into depression, anxiety, obsessive and compulsive behavior, eating disorders, self-harm, and substance abuse. It can even lead to suicide.
The statistics don’t lie. Perfectionism is an epidemic. Recent studies show that 3 out of every 10 school-age children exhibit unhealthy perfectionistic tendencies. Textbooks are being revised and a number of long-time researchers in the psychology community are calling out for a greater recognition of the problem of perfectionism as a root cause for a cocktail of psychiatric problems.
Letters to a Perfectionist is a collection of 22 letters which exposes the roots of perfectionism and the way it manifests in our lives and relationships. The author writes from his own experience, and raises questions about perfectionism you won’t find other people asking. From the first letter to the last, Tad Frizzell takes the reader on a journey of self-discovery. The final destination is a place of unconditional love and gratitude. Tad Frizzell’s book makes the reader feel cherished, while giving a clear path to self understanding. There’s never been a book quite like this before.
In this book you will learn:
• Why perfectionism is best viewed as a spiritual problem
• The pervasive nature of perfectionism
• The neuroscience behind the perfectionist’s thoughts and emotions
• The impact of perfectionism on our relationships
• What motivates perfectionists
• How perfectionism can cause a crisis of identity
• About the need for security and the strategy of control
• The dangers of spiritual perfectionism
• How a perfectionist eventually “burns out”
• How we can choose to transform the burnout from darkness into light
• The power of observation and self-empathy
• What a new way of being looks like
• The power of connecting the mind and the heart
• How to transform self-hatred into self-compassion
• The beauty of a life marked by forgiveness, love, and gratitude
• The surprising treasures hidden inside the perfectionist…and how to uncover them
Are you concerned that you are suffering from perfectionism, that refusal to love and accept yourself in a state of imperfection? Do you see someone you love suffering, believing they will never measure up to the unrealistic expectations they have set or adopted for themselves? Then you need to understand the problem. One early reader of Letters to a Perfectionist told the author: “There are so many poignant phrases throughout the book that I can open up to any page and find something to inspire me – and also inform my work as a therapist.”
Don’t wait until it’s too late! Buy Letters to a Perfectionist and begin your journey from perfectionistic pain to healing and wholeness today.
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I’ve traveled the world, climbed high mountains, and lived in a monastery, only to find out that the greatest wilderness is in the human heart, and the mysteries we seek to understand unfold only in the present moment. I write to understand myself and the joy and pain of life and love.
My new book was inspired by my experience of a lifelong spiritual quest which was often hampered by a kind of perfectionism which – after a crisis of burnout and a lot of soul-searching – I eventually began to see as a spiritual problem. So I wrote the book that I wished I could read.
Along with writing (working on a novel now) I manage the music of a composer and pianist. I love mountains, nature, and reading.