About Fix Your Freaking Marriage: Practical Tips to Just Start Somewhere by Jennifer Paweleck Bellingrodt, Psy.D.
Let’s be honest: Marriage is two heads in one relationship, and that math doesn’t always work well. In this book, you’ll hear from a therapist of over two decades about the most common problems in marriage and how to remedy them, as well as how to fight fairly, resolve disagreements and handle partners with difficult personalities. If you’re in—or interested in—a romantic relationship, this book can help you. If you’re not married, this book can help you know what to look for in a partner and enter into a relationship with your eyes wide open. If your marriage is struggling, this book can help you gain control by creating structure and giving you a place to start making changes. If your marriage is pretty good, this book will give you tweaks to make it even better and create richer experiences with your spouse. If your marriage is on the rocks, this book can help you identify the issues that you can then take to a therapist as a starting point. If your marriage is perfect, you’re lying to yourself, and you can’t be helped.
Comin’ in hot with the bottom line here: ANY two people CAN get along IF they WANT to. So, if your marriage is struggling, it’s because one or both of you are immature. There’s no reason you can’t have the marriage you desire. The methods detailed in this book work because they acknowledge this and present ways to change the narrative of your relationship by improving your personal performance. Some of them are big and may take a lot of soul-searching and forgiveness to implement. Many of them are small and work best when they accumulate over time. Either way, it’s time to grow up, and this book will show you how. Buckle up, kids.
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Author Bio:
Hi there! I’m Dr. Jennifer Paweleck-Bellingrodt. I know that’s a mouthful. I’ve been called Dr. J, Dr. Jen, Dr. B, Captain P, Doc, Shrinky Dink and, my favorite, Dr. Bollingdoctor (as well as a few names I probably don’t care to know!). You can call me Jen. For those of you who don’t know me, I’ll tell you a bit about myself here so that you know that I know what I’m talking about in this book.
I’m a licensed clinical psychologist with a private practice in Goodyear, Arizona. I was born and raised in the great state of Texas and attended the University of Texas at Austin for my bachelor’s degree. I then went on to Baylor University to get my master’s and doctorate in psychology. While I was at Baylor, I was commissioned as an officer in the United States Army as part of their Health Professions Scholarship Program. After three years of graduate work, I was selected for a residency at Walter Reed Army Medical Center in Washington, D.C. After residency, I served an additional three years of active duty as a military psychologist stationed at Fort Huachuca, a military intelligence installation located in Sierra Vista, AZ. Upon honorable discharge from active duty in 2004, I established a private practice, and that’s what I’ve been doing ever since.
I’ve done a combination of therapy, consultation, lecturing, coaching and clinical supervision for more than two decades. In addition to being a therapist, I maintain psychological and spiritual blogs on my website, www.doctorbellingrodt.com. I also host a podcast and offer both free and paid training via my online psychoeducation training platform, www.thepsychoeducationacademy.thinkific.com.
I believe the mind and body are inextricably linked, and I offer my patients a holistic approach wherein we look at various historical and current psychological and physical contributions to mental health functioning. It’s all connected, so I look at everything I can to try to get to the bottom of why a person’s brain is playing tricks on them. I believe everyone can benefit from therapy because sometimes we can’t see the forest for the trees. That is, sometimes we can’t see how we’re in our own way and we need help getting out of it. No one’s perfect, and we ALL need a little help sometimes.
My approach to therapy includes a deep dive into family history, what I call “beginning at the beginning,” because we are the sum total of ALL of our experiences, good, bad and otherwise. I can teach you coping skills and tactics of all kinds to overcome your challenges, but if you don’t understand how you got where you are, why you think and behave the way you do, that’s just putting a bandaid on a bullet hole. I say it this way: You have to go through it to undo it. In other words, bandages won’t suffice when surgery is what’s really required.
I specialize in the treatment of personality disorders and women’s issues, the latter of which has often been a springboard for the couples’ work I really enjoy. I also hold a special place in my heart for working with military service members and veterans.
Last, but not least, I am a Christ follower, wife and mother of two children. In my off time, I enjoy spending time with family, writing, traveling, hosting wine tastings and reading about six different books at the same time.
My approach isn’t for everyone. I’m not known for mollycoddling; just ask any one of my patients. That being said, I’m certain this book will upset some people’s sensibilities, but it’s based on my true experience of working with couples for 20+ years. Love it or leave it. Remember, no one’s forcing you to read it. (But I’ll bet you’ll be better for it!)