Interview With Author Gabriel Van Arneman
Tell us about yourself and how many books you have written.
I have a background in biology, applied psychology, and coaching, which gives me a unique lens through which I explore human behavior. I’ve spent many years coaching both individuals and couples in the emotional intricacies of love and identity. I’ve been happily married for over 30 years, father of three daughters, and proud grandfather of two beautiful grandsons. Infatuation Doesn’t Happen to You; You Choose It! is my first published book, but it’s the result of decades of life experience, research, and real human connection.
What is the name of your latest book and what inspired it?
My latest book is titled Infatuation doesn’t happen to you; you choose it! The inspiration came through my coaching practice, where I often witnessed people feeling powerless in the face of infatuation. I saw a pattern—people believed they were victims of their emotions, but in reality, many of those emotions were decisions shaped by unconscious beliefs, needs, and narratives. I wanted to shift that mindset and help people understand how much power they actually have in matters of the heart.
Do you have any unusual writing habits?
Definitely. I tend to write much more than intended. One chapter can easily spill over into three, because I often dive into related themes that are rich enough to fill other books. I’ve learned to hold myself back—just a little!—to keep the focus clear. Also, I write best when I imagine I’m speaking directly to someone I’ve coached, which helps me keep the tone authentic and relatable.
What authors, or books have influenced you?
Without question, the Bible has had the greatest influence on both my personal life and professional thinking. In addition, I draw from scientific and management literature—especially works in social psychology. I’m also inspired by authors like Stephen M.R. Covey, John C. Maxwell, and Tony Evans, who combine leadership, wisdom, and faith in a grounded and practical way.
What are you working on now?
I’m currently working on a book about pastoral care—particularly focusing on the ethical, emotional, and psychological weight many people carry today. In a time where genuine care and community are often lacking, I want to explore how we can rebuild that support structure and bring healing through presence, understanding, and spiritual insight.
What is your best method or website when it comes to promoting your books?
So far, I’ve had good experiences combining free promotion periods via Amazon KDP with community-driven platforms like Awesomegang and Book Goodies. But honestly, nothing beats the power of authentic recommendations and thoughtful reviews. Word-of-mouth from early readers, especially those who truly connected with the message, has been my most powerful promotional tool.
Do you have any advice for new authors?
Write from the heart, but don’t forget to listen. The world doesn’t need more perfect books—it needs more honest voices. Be open to feedback, stay humble, and trust that even if your book reaches just one person deeply, it’s worth it.
What is the best advice you have ever heard?
What you’re most afraid to write is exactly what someone needs to hear.” That advice has stayed with me. It reminds me that vulnerability is often the door to impact.
What are you reading now?
Right now, I’m reading the Bible—especially the book of Ecclesiastes, which is full of timeless wisdom from Solomon. It’s a rich, reflective text that speaks deeply to life’s biggest questions.
What’s next for you as a writer?
Beyond finishing my pastoral care book, I plan to develop coaching materials and perhaps an online course. Writing is just one part of my calling—I also want to create tools that help people grow emotionally, spiritually, and relationally in everyday life.
If you were going to be stranded on a desert island and allowed to take 3 or 4 books with you what books would you bring?
I’d definitely bring my Bible—it’s a source of endless wisdom, comfort, and motivation. I’d also pack a good puzzle book, like one filled with Sudoku, to keep my mind sharp and occupied. As for novels or non-fiction, I might resist bringing them because I’d finish them too fast :)!
Author Websites and Profiles
Gabriel Van Arneman Amazon Profile
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