About Sperm & Eggs
In ‘Sperm & Eggs – Attraction’, we emphasise how human sperm and eggs need to know what they’re doing. We contrast the human reasoning approach with animal instinct in bringing the two together. How we, the small litter strategists need to work out before consummation the best genetic mixture we can muster for our offspring.
Men are guided by the desires of their sperm. While women are restricted to producing one offspring at a time, saddled with a long gestation period during which she has to eat gherkins and coal for her tea. As thinking animals, we have time to overcome our confusion and deduce how our leaky juvenile genitals can be used reproductively.
Cue sex hormones and how an obsession with sex (and particularly among male scaffolders) enables sperm to stay on task.
We consider then what attracts women to men and vice versa, the egg strategy of attracting sperm-carriers using the art of titillation. The lure too, as evidenced in making up the lips to mimic the front bottom. And not forgetting suggestiveness, how men are intrigued by women eating bananas and how men licking the tops of yoghurt cartons could be of equal interest to ladies. In Switzerland, a man might impress a lady at dinner only to find himself sexually blacklisted for displaying a lack of finesse and sensitivity over pudding.
We look at how humans constantly redefine appeal with changes in hair fashion in contrast to the evergreen slicked-back look of the chimpanzee and the never-changing coiffeur of the poodle. Of course, as profound thinkers, scope for getting things wrong is inevitable. We explore misconceptions of what we believe is attractive. In Medieval Europe, for instance, when men wore a codpiece rammed down the front of their tights – pouches designed to either create the impression that the wearer had a pressing engagement, else signal that he might be hoping for one. And cryptic messages older, ‘off-peak’ humans put out attempting to cling onto their youth. Older women painting their eyebrows in the style of cameo Vulcans in Star Trek. The signal they send out to men analogous to that received by a motorist on his car radio while driving under a motorway bridge in gale force winds. While, older men, positioned at the bar upon a pub barstool, are still able to entice ladies passing by on their way back from the toilets with the simple but seductive salutation, “Allo, darlin’!’. Oftentimes saying and doing no more, bringing the seduction to a close, flushed with success and content to draw admiring looks from his stool compatriots.
This is the first book of three in the Sperm & Eggs series, titled ‘Sperm & Eggs – Attraction’. The other two books are ‘Sperm & Eggs – Interaction’ and ‘Sperm & Eggs – Relationships’.
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Author Bio:
Paul Angliss, the book’s author – circumnavigated Australia in the 1980s on a Greyhound bus. ‘Don’t Read This Book’, a surreal, fictionalised travelogue ensued. Another fiction was inspired by his overland journey from Australia back to the Mother Country. Performance beckoned. He wrote, produced and directed a play – ‘Planet of the Apes – the Dolly Grip’s Cut’ – which earnt a spot at an Edinburgh Fringe venue. That led to stand-up, the zenith his appearance at The Comedy Store. He won the Rizla ‘Roll Your Own’ national comedy short film competition with ‘Lawnmower, Version 1.2’, a video tutorial demonstrating a menial task to the computer literate.
Paul wrote and developed a sit-com and a half-hour sketch show, ‘So What Have We Learnt?’ presenting ‘dumbed-up’ versions of television fare. Though it wasn’t commissioned, it did interest Andrew Gillman (Director of ‘The Day Today’) in collaborating on a series of 10-minute spoof documentaries. Which led, in turn, to interest from a TV production company wanting to see a 30-minute format. That triggered the conception of a mystery novel, ‘The Investigations of the Para-Usual ’ (The IPU) a comedy about catastrophic climate change. Essentially, a Life of Brian for the 21st Century. Meanwhile, he wrote and sold sketches to BBC Radio 4’s ‘Newsjack’ and a Radio 7 show. He was longlisted for the David Nobbs Memorial sitcom prize in 2023 for a TV series adaptation of The IPU.
Simon Thompson, the illustrator, is a very experienced and talented book designer.